Have you ever answered a question too quickly?
You know the feeling. The situation heats up. The quarrel escalates. Your heart races, your face flushes, and before you can stop yourself—Bam! The door slams.
I’ve been there. For years, I struggled with this fast-twitch emotional reaction. It wasn’t until later that I realized there was a specific physiological response happening—a “Cycle” where the body gets flooded with cortisol and adrenaline.
When I eventually read Daniel Kahneman’s famous work, Thinking, Fast and Slow, everything finally clicked into place.
System 1 vs. System 2
Kahneman explains that our brains operate in two modes. System 1 is fast, instinctive, and emotional. It’s the brain that saved our ancestors from predators in the forest, but today, it’s the brain that makes us say things we regret in meeting rooms. System 2 is slower, logical, and deliberate.
While Kahneman’s book provides the brilliant academic framework, I realized there was a gap. We know why we react poorly, but how do we physically stop it in the heat of the moment?
The Power of The Pause
In my book, Corporate Communication DNA, I move beyond the theory and give you clear, practical advice on how to train your brain. I focus on a technique I call The Pause.
The Pause is not just about being quiet; it is a tool to break the hormonal cycle of stress. It allows your brain to “click over” and switch from System 1 to System 2.
- An Answer is an immediate System 1 reaction (often regretted).
- A Response is a calculated System 2 reply (effective and controlled).
When you learn to utilize The Pause, you stop simply answering and start responding. The difference in your professional and personal relationships will be night and day.
My Recent “System 1” Test: The Amazon Glitch
I had to put my own advice to the test recently.
Out of nowhere, my Amazon KDP (Kindle Direct Publishing) account was closed—suspended and practically killed. I spent days discussing this with customer service. It would have been easy to let the adrenaline take over, to get angry, and to burn bridges.
Instead, I managed to get the account reopened. However, there was a cost. I had to republish with new links, meaning all my previous sales data disappeared. Worse yet, all my hard-earned reviews were nuked.
A Fresh Start (and a Free Gift)
But, we move forward. The book is back online with a fresh link.
To celebrate this “re-launch,” the eBook version of Corporate Communication DNA is currently FREE to read for Kindle Unlimited members.
If you have ever felt that rush of adrenaline ruin a conversation, I invite you to download the book. It offers the practical methods you need to master your own communication DNA.
One Small Favor: Because Amazon erased my history, I am starting from zero. If you download the book and find value in it, please leave a review. It would mean the world to me and help other readers find this advice.
Happy responding (not reacting),
Tom Wawer